Disappointing

I went to school today and I've got all my exam paper one shot. Was expecting to have a good day but I went totally crazy after I get my marks. Really disappointing. I know should blame it on myself though as I did not work hard for final exam. Very speechless. Very.

Of all the subject, I failed the most important subject which I should not fail in order to stay in the same class next year. Well, I really do want to stay in the same class next year. I failed 2 main subjects. Very bad. I don't even know how to tell my parents if they ask. I will never ever tell them my marks unless they ask. Even if they would, I will just say I still haven't get my exam papers yet. Sounds good aite.

What can I do, past is just past. Next year will be my last year aka SPM year. Sounds damn scary. I don't wanna go to form 5 like hell-to-the-NO. I am going to suffer I tell you. I have to study hard (the same thing I've been saying for the past 2 years) haha.

I only have these 2 months to enjoy. As if. I wish I could. Might be busy preparing my sister's wedding. I don't want to think too much about next year, I can go insane. Really. By the time, let's enjoy these few weeks to the max. This holiday might be the last time I can go out and spend quality times with my buddies. Sad. But I am still going to join cheerleading though.

Tomorrow will be the last day of school. How cool is that. Shall take pictures to keep as memories. And going to miss Form 4 very much. My awesome classmates that will never be forgotten, my beloved teachers for teaching us throughout the year (still got next year haha).

Well, I should probably head to bed by now. Till then, goodnight loves.

The hardest decisions.

When I care about someone, I really do care. When I love someone, I truly do. But at the end of the day, you have to let go of someone right for some reasons. In this case, I've been such a bad girl and only god knows what I've been through throughout the year.

I've never had a long-term relationship before. Now I'm having it and it is very very hard to let it go. I don't want to waste what we had ever since we've met. It's been a long journey between us. We have been through thick and thin. However, I gotta move on one day and it will not be an easy thing to do. People learn and move on. Hopefully I can manage to do that. I try to be strong and patient but it takes forever.

People get hurt learn all the time. We learn from that. Like Kim Kardashian, she filed a divorce 72 days after her marriage. The wedding that she had just wasted. Anything can happen to anyone. We just never know. My friend was right, 'we can't always follow our heart. we have to think wise too. that's why God gives us brain'

I trust no one. I can't listen what other people say. But I can't avoid from the truth either. Somehow I have to do it and deal with it no matter how tough it is.

#When I was hugging him today, my tears started dropping. But I never said why. I just don't know how to say. I couldn't